1:1 Life Coaching Sessions for High Achievers.

BLOG

• How to Validate Yourself

  Caring What Others Think

  We’ve all heard it: “Just don’t care what people think.” A phrase that is repeated in self-help books, Instagram quotes, and in the advice given by well-meaning friends. And in theory, it sounds empowering. But in reality, we need each other for survival and we inherently yearn to belong, so it makes sense that we would in fact care about what others think about us. To care at least a little is crucial to establishing connections and empathizing with other humans. The part where it gets tricky is when we define our worth and personality by it.

  Depending on your social standing, what people think of you can mean everything. It can decide whether you get hired, fired, befriended or unfriended. In some extreme cases, it can get you hurt or killed. With such high stakes, where’s the line between what others think and how that should –or shouldn’t– affect us?

  Self-Improvement for High Achievers Group on Telegram

  Get daily insights, support, and discussions to improve your leadership skills, mindset, work/life balance, time and energy management, as well as overcoming perfectionism, self-doubt, limiting beliefs, and more...

  Join group

  Things to Remember

  You’re Not Going To Please Everyone

  Someone will always misread you. There is no way absolutely everyone can see or understand you, and to try is to deprive you of your own autonomy. Trying to please everyone will make you miss out on yourself and will deplete you. Sometimes, people might want more from you than you can give. If we are constantly trying to please others, then we are constantly abandoning ourselves. If someone’s going to be unhappy with you, it is easier to learn to cope with others’ disappointment than it is spending a life trying to avoid it.

  People’s Opinions of You Are Incomplete

  Even your own opinion of you is incomplete.

  No one gets the whole picture. Not your boss. Not your ex. Not even your best friend. They see a version of you that’s only been around for a fraction of your life, but never your whole life. How we present to the outside world, no matter how authentic, is still a mask. You’re building the map of yourself as you go. There will be, if there haven’t been already, moments where you surprise even yourself. No matter how well you know yourself, we always remain at least a little mysterious to our own consciousness. So anyone’s opinion of you can never fully hold you, whether for better or for worse.

  Only You Hold All of Past-You’s

  While you may not know yourself as well as you think you do, you do have a collection of the You’s you’ve been before today. You are the only one who remembers what it felt like to be five years old or the first time you felt most afraid. The only one who knows what that teenage heartbreak really cost you. You’re the only one that’s been there for every movie you’ve watched and song you’ve heard. The only one who’s lived every moment of your joy, your shame, your silence, your hope. Other people may witness parts of you, but only you hold the full archive. Only you can validate the memory of who you’ve been.

  What if You’re the Problem?

  What if we do need a reality check? Sometimes feedback is the thing that wakes us up, helps us grow, helps us see the ways we’ve been showing up in contradiction to our own values, or let’s us know if we’re being hurtful. So always ignoring feedback or detaching from it entirely isn’t the right move either, nuance is important. The real work is in staying rooted in yourself while sharing a reality with the rest of the world. Let the feedback you receive be something you filter to give you data, and not something you absorb as a gospel truth.

  Community Mirrors

  While it may seem counterintuitive to talk about reflecting off others when talking about self-validation, it’s important to discuss interdependence. When we talk about validating yourself through community, it doesn’t mean validating yourself through their approval, it means validating yourself through resonance. Rather than be constantly chasing after praise or looking for people to approve of your every decision, you build relationships with others where you allow yourself to be seen and where you see others. A community mirror should feel validating by reflecting back the confirmation of who you are. And as a community mirror, you are also a space for others to validate themselves. Accountability and compassion can coexist in this space. In this way, self-validation becomes something we practice alongside and not through the other.

  

  What Validating Yourself Looks Like

  Identify the Inner Critic

  The only reason why we care about specific peoples’ opinions is because of a power we’ve assigned to them, not because of a power they actually hold. Why we’ve assigned them that power is a combination of our possible traumas, context, culture, and personal belief system. So while it may seem like all we’re seeking is that external validation, what we’re actually looking for are cues that confirm either our worst fears or biggest hopes in regards to ourselves depending on the moment. In a way it’s like being afraid of a shadow only to turn around and see it was just a shadow puppet all along. Once we identify what the “shadow puppet” is, we cut out the middle man and release them of their power. Ask yourself, whose standards am I measuring myself by? Who taught me this was the way to be good, worthy, loveable? Once you identify who else’s standards you’re living, you get to decide if you really want that as part of your inner world —or not.

  Rewriting the Script

  Rewriting the script means refusing to keep reciting a story that keeps you small. The way we talk to ourselves matters. It becomes the lens through which we see the world and our place in it. If your self-talk is full of “I’m too much,” “I should’ve known better,” “Why can’t I be normal,” then your nervous system will follow suit. But when you shift that language to things like, “I’m allowed to take up space,” or “I didn’t know then what I know now,” you start building trust with yourself. Narrative therapy calls this externalizing the problem which is when you realize that the shame, the perfectionism, the self-erasure aren’t you, they’re stories you’ve been taught. And if they were learned, they can be unlearned. It’s saying: I get to choose how I speak to myself. And that choice shapes everything.

  Try these rewrites to see how they feel:

  • I give myself permission to disappoint the expectations that were never mine.
  • I did what I had to do to survive. Now I get to choose differently.
  • Their inability to see me clearly is more about them than about me.
  • I don’t need to be understood to be whole.
  • I don’t owe anyone my pain.

  

  Check out the Vision to Action Digital Planner PDF for only 5$

  More info

  Somatic Self-Validation

  Sometimes your brain is too loud, too tired, or too tangled to give you the words you need. That’s when the body steps in. Self-validation doesn’t always have to be verbal. In fact, somatic forms of connecting to your body are essential ways to validate yourself.

  When you feel the pull to people-please, over-apologize, or shrink, try coming back to your body:

  • Put your hand on your chest and say, “I’m here.”
  • Breathe into your belly and feel your feet on the ground.
  • Sit in a way that takes up just a little more space than usual.
  • Let your shoulders drop. Let your jaw soften.

  These are small ways to say: I belong in this moment. I don’t have to earn space. I already have it.

  You Get to Choose

  You are allowed to care what others think, you’re a human being trying to make it in a harsh world and we’re wired for connection. But that doesn’t mean everyone gets to define you. Not everyone’s gaze is worth internalizing. Not every opinion deserves a seat at your inner table. Self-validation is not about pretending the world can’t hurt you. It’s about reminding yourself, over and over again, that your worth was never up for debate. It’s choosing, every day, to be on your own side — even if you’re still learning how. You’re not here to be perfect; you get to just be real. And real people grow, mess up, connect, re-center, and keep going.

  Quiz: What Is Blocking Your Success?

  This quick quiz will help you figure out which mental or behavioral pattern might be holding you back from achieving your full potential. Identifying your specific success blocker is the first step toward breaking through to new levels of achievement and fulfillment.

  Read each question and choose the answer that feels most true to your situation.

  No email or payment is required to complete the quiz and receive your personalized insights.

  Paloma Chiara

  Read blog

• How to Create Your Morning Routine (+ Routines from Wellness Experts)

  The way you start your morning sets the tone for your entire day. While hitting snooze and scrolling through social media might feel satisfying in the moment, research shows that intentional morning habits can transform your productivity, health, and overall wellbeing.

  Individuals who follow consistent morning routines report higher productivity levels and lower stress throughout the day. But what exactly makes a morning routine effective?

  In this comprehensive guide, we’ll break down the science behind successful morning routines and share practical steps to build your own. Plus, you’ll get an exclusive look at the morning habits of leading wellness experts who have mastered the art of starting their day right.

  Whether you’re looking to boost your energy, improve your focus, or simply bring more intention to your mornings, you’ll find actionable strategies that work with your lifestyle and goals. Let’s discover how the first hour of your day can become your secret weapon for success.

  The Science Behind Effective Morning Routines

  How Morning Habits Affect Brain Function

  The first 60-90 minutes after waking represent a crucial window for your brain. During this period, your prefrontal cortex - responsible for decision-making and focused attention - is gradually coming online. The activities you engage in during this time literally shape your brain’s functioning for the hours that follow.

  When you wake up, your brain transitions from deep sleep to relaxed alertness. What you do during this transition significantly impacts your cognitive performance. People who engage in mindful activities during their first waking hour show enhanced executive function throughout the day compared to those who immediately expose themselves to stressful stimuli like news or work emails.

  Benefits of Consistent Morning Routines

  The power of a morning routine extends far beyond just “starting your day right.” Here’s what research tells us about the benefits:

  1. Reduced Decision Fatigue: The average adult makes thousands of decisions daily. By automating your morning through routine, you conserve mental energy for more important decisions. This is why some successful entrepreneurs wear the same outfit daily.

  2. Improved Stress Management: Individuals with established morning routines show lower stress levels throughout the day compared to those with chaotic mornings.

  3. Enhanced Productivity: Morning routines create momentum. Completing small tasks in the morning activates your brain’s reward system, releasing dopamine and motivating you to maintain productivity.

  4. Better Physical Health: People who maintain morning routines are more likely to maintain regular exercise habits and adhere to healthy eating patterns.

  5. Improved Mental Health: Consistent morning routines provide psychological safety and predictability, which can reduce anxiety and symptoms of depression by creating a sense of control and accomplishment early in the day.

  Why the First Hour After Waking Is Crucial

  The first hour after waking is particularly influential for several reasons:

  1. Your brain is highly receptive: During this period, your brainwave patterns are more malleable, making it an optimal time for learning, reflection, and setting intentions.

  2. Your willpower is at its peak: Self-control is a finite resource that depletes throughout the day. Starting with your most important activities capitalizes on this natural advantage.

  3. You’re less likely to be interrupted: Early morning hours typically offer solitude before the demands of others begin to compete for your attention.

  4. You’re establishing metabolic patterns: What you consume (or don’t consume) during this first hour can influence your blood sugar levels, energy, and hunger patterns for the entire day.

  Morning light exposure during this period is particularly effective at regulating your body’s internal clock, improving sleep quality the following night and optimizing hormone production.

  When you understand the biological and psychological significance of your morning hours, creating an intentional routine becomes less about productivity hacks and more about aligning with your body’s natural rhythms for optimal functioning.

  

  How to Build Your Personalized Morning Routine

  Creating a morning routine that actually sticks requires more than copying what works for others. Your ideal routine should align with your natural rhythms, lifestyle constraints, and personal goals. Here’s how to build one that works for you:

  Step 1: Identify Your Morning Chronotype

  Are you naturally an early bird or a night owl? Your chronotype - your body’s natural sleep-wake cycle - plays a crucial role in determining when you should wake up and what activities will feel energizing versus draining.

  Early Birds (larks) typically:

  • Feel most alert between 6 AM and noon
  • Naturally wake up between 5:30-7:00 AM
  • Experience an energy dip in mid-afternoon
  • Prefer going to bed before 10 PM

  Night Owls typically:

  • Feel most alert in the evening
  • Naturally wake up between 8-10 AM (or later)
  • Experience increased energy after 2 PM
  • Prefer going to bed after 11 PM

  If you’re a night owl forced to wake up early for work, don’t fight your nature entirely. Instead, design a gentler morning routine that gradually builds energy rather than demanding peak performance immediately upon waking.

  Step 2: Determine Your Core Morning Priorities

  Before adding activities to your morning, identify what you want to accomplish. Common morning priorities include:

  • Physical health: Exercise, stretching, healthy breakfast
  • Mental clarity: Meditation, journaling, planning
  • Personal growth: Reading, learning, skill development
  • Family connection: Quality time with loved ones
  • Professional preparation: Email review, task planning, creative work

  Choose 2-3 core priorities that align with your values and goals. Trying to pack too much into your morning often leads to a routine that feels overwhelming rather than energizing.

  Step 3: Start Small with 1-2 Key Habits

  The biggest mistake people make when creating morning routines is trying to change everything at once. Instead, start with just one or two simple habits and build from there.

  Good starter habits include:

  • Drinking a glass of water upon waking
  • Making your bed
  • Stepping outside for 5 minutes
  • Writing down three things you’re grateful for
  • Doing 10 jumping jacks or stretches

  Once these feel automatic (usually after 2-4 weeks), you can add additional elements to your routine.

  Step 4: Prepare the Night Before

  A successful morning routine actually starts the evening before. Preparation eliminates decision-making and friction that can derail your morning intentions.

  Evening preparation checklist:

  • Lay out your clothes
  • Prepare breakfast ingredients
  • Set up your workout clothes or meditation space
  • Charge devices and set them away from your bed
  • Review your schedule for the next day
  • Set a consistent bedtime to ensure adequate sleep

  Step 5: Create Environment Triggers for Success

  Your environment should support your morning routine, not work against it. Small changes to your physical space can make a big difference in maintaining consistency.

  Environment optimization tips:

  • Place a water bottle by your bed
  • Keep a journal and pen on your nightstand
  • Set up a designated space for exercise or meditation
  • Use blackout curtains for better sleep, then open them immediately upon waking
  • Keep healthy breakfast options easily accessible
  • Remove tempting distractions (like phones) from your bedroom

  Step 6: Track and Adjust Your Routine

  Monitor how your routine affects your energy, mood, and productivity throughout the day. Keep a simple log for the first few weeks, noting:

  • What time you woke up
  • Which activities you completed
  • How you felt during and after your routine
  • Your energy levels throughout the day
  • Any obstacles you encountered

  Use this information to refine your routine. If something consistently feels forced or unsustainable, modify or replace it with something that better fits your lifestyle.

  Self-Improvement for High Achievers Group on Telegram

  Get daily insights, support, and discussions to improve your leadership skills, mindset, work/life balance, time and energy management, as well as overcoming perfectionism, self-doubt, limiting beliefs, and more...

  Join group

  Essential Components of a Productive Morning

  While everyone’s ideal morning routine is different, certain elements consistently contribute to better days. You don’t need to include all of these, but consider incorporating those that resonate with your goals and lifestyle.

  Hydration Strategies

  After 6-8 hours without water, your body wakes up naturally dehydrated. Proper morning hydration kickstarts your metabolism, improves brain function, and helps you feel more alert.

  Effective hydration approaches:

  • Drink 16-20 ounces of water within 30 minutes of waking
  • Add a pinch of sea salt or electrolytes if you sweat a lot or exercise early
  • Try warm water with lemon for digestive benefits
  • Avoid excessive caffeine on an empty stomach, which can increase anxiety and disrupt blood sugar

  Movement and Exercise Options

  Morning movement doesn’t have to mean an intense workout at the gym. Any form of physical activity helps increase blood flow, release endorphins, and boost energy levels.

  Low-intensity options:

  • 5-10 minutes of stretching or yoga
  • A walk around the block
  • Dancing to 2-3 favorite songs
  • Simple bodyweight exercises (push-ups, squats, planks)

  Moderate-intensity options:

  • 20-30 minute workout routine
  • Jogging or cycling
  • Swimming
  • Structured yoga or fitness class

  High-intensity options:

  • CrossFit or HIIT workouts
  • Long runs or bike rides
  • Strength training sessions
  • Competitive sports

  Choose an intensity level that energizes rather than exhausts you for the rest of your day.

  Mindfulness and Mental Preparation

  Taking time for mental preparation helps you approach your day with intention rather than reactivity. This doesn’t require lengthy meditation sessions - even 5-10 minutes can make a significant difference.

  Mindfulness practices:

  • Deep breathing exercises (try the 4-7-8 technique)
  • Guided meditation using apps like Headspace or Calm
  • Gratitude journaling - write down 3 things you appreciate
  • Visualization of your ideal day
  • Stream-of-consciousness writing to clear mental clutter
  • Setting daily intentions or affirmations

  Nutrition Fundamentals

  What you eat (or don’t eat) in the morning significantly impacts your energy levels, focus, and mood throughout the day. Focus on foods that provide sustained energy rather than quick spikes and crashes.

  Morning nutrition principles:

  • Include protein to stabilize blood sugar and maintain satiety
  • Add healthy fats for brain function and hormone production
  • Choose complex carbohydrates over simple sugars
  • Eat within 1-2 hours of waking to kickstart your metabolism
  • Consider intermittent fasting if it aligns with your health goals

  Balanced breakfast ideas:

  • Greek yogurt with berries and nuts
  • Vegetable omelet with avocado
  • Oatmeal with protein powder and fruit
  • Smoothie with greens, protein, and healthy fats
  • Whole grain toast with nut butter and banana

  Goal-Setting and Planning Practices

  Spending a few minutes planning your day helps you feel organized and focused rather than scattered and reactive.

  Planning activities:

  • Review your calendar and priorities
  • Identify your top 3 must-do tasks
  • Block time for important activities
  • Anticipate potential challenges and solutions
  • Set specific, achievable goals for the day
  • Write down your schedule to reduce mental load

  

  Check out the Mobile-Friendly Planner Spreadsheet Template for only 4$

  More info

  Common Morning Routine Mistakes to Avoid

  Even well-intentioned morning routines can fail if you fall into these common traps:

  Starting with Email or Social Media

  Checking your phone first thing in the morning immediately puts you in reactive mode rather than proactive mode. Email and social media flood your brain with other people’s priorities and can trigger stress or anxiety before you’ve even started your day.

  Instead: Keep your phone out of the bedroom or use airplane mode until you’ve completed your morning routine. If you must check your phone, limit it to essential communications only.

  Trying to Change Too Much at Once

  Attempting to overhaul your entire morning routine overnight usually leads to failure and frustration. Your brain needs time to form new neural pathways, and your willpower is limited.

  Instead: Focus on one habit at a time. Once something feels automatic (usually after 21-66 days), add another element to your routine.

  Ignoring Your Natural Energy Patterns

  Fighting against your chronotype or expecting peak performance immediately upon waking sets you up for disappointment, especially if you’re naturally a night owl.

  Instead: Design your routine around your natural energy patterns. If you’re not a morning person, start with gentle activities and gradually build intensity as you become more alert.

  Not Allowing Flexibility

  Rigid routines that can’t adapt to changing circumstances often become sources of stress rather than support. Life happens - you’ll have bad nights of sleep, sick children, early meetings, or travel.

  Instead: Create a “minimum viable routine” - the 1-2 most important activities you can do even on challenging days. This maintains consistency without perfectionism.

  Skipping the Foundation: Sleep

  You can’t out-routine a poor night’s sleep. If you’re consistently tired in the morning, the problem might not be your routine but your sleep schedule.

  Instead: Prioritize getting 7-9 hours of quality sleep. This might mean adjusting your bedtime rather than your wake time.

  Morning Routines from Wellness Experts

  Learning from professionals who have mastered their morning routines can provide inspiration and practical ideas for your own. Here are the detailed morning routines of four wellness experts, each with their unique approach to starting the day right.

  Dt. Vasundhara Agrawal - Nutrition Consultant & Lifestyle Coach

  As a nutrition consultant who works with clients while raising a child, Dt. Vasundhara Agrawal has crafted a routine that balances family responsibilities with personal wellness and professional preparation.

  6:00 AM – I wake up and chug a glass of water while stepping out to the balcony or terrace for 5 minutes of light movement—neck rolls, jumping in place, or a walk to spark alertness.

  6:10 AM – I prep my son’s lunch and help him get ready for school—this time grounds me and gives emotional presence before the workday rush.

  6:45 AM – Once he’s out, I grab a light bite (like a fruit or handful of nuts) and do a 10-minute calendar + call review, mentally rehearsing my energy for each client touchpoint.

  7:00 AM – I power through one focused task—emails, scripts, or design feedback—before I switch to my mat.

  7:45–8:45 AM – Yoga: my daily hour of sweat, stretch, and breath that resets everything.

  9:00 AM – I sit down for real breakfast, feeling earned, calm, and clear for a productive day ahead.

  Key takeaways from Vasundhara’s routine:

  • Immediate hydration and light movement upon waking
  • Prioritizing family time as part of morning grounding
  • Strategic work preparation before physical exercise
  • Earning breakfast through movement and productivity

  Alisa Connan - Health and Wellbeing Coach

  As a mother, writer, and health coach, Alisa Connan has created a routine that supports her nervous system while incorporating cutting-edge wellness practices.

  6:15 AM – I start the day with cuddles with my son, then prep breakfast and drink electrolytes to gently rehydrate.

  6:30 AM – I move into my red light sauna and do a stream-of-consciousness brain dump in my journal while listening to the same playlist every morning—it cues my body and mind that it’s time to ground and to let go of anything that doesn’t serve me, and to notice what does. I follow this with a cold shower, which supports vagus nerve tone, immune resilience, and brown fat activation for metabolic health. It’s an invigorating reset that leaves me clearer, calmer, and energised to start my day.

  7:00 AM – I eat a savoury breakfast with at least 30g of protein—often full-fat yogurt with cinnamon, nuts, seeds, berries, and chia jam—to stabilise blood sugar, fuel my focus, and support hormone balance.

  8:30 AM – After school drop-off, I step into the sunshine barefoot and focus on breath my delicious dirty chai (chai latte with coffee). Delaying caffeine for two hours supports my natural cortisol curve, while the sunlight and grounded feet help anchor my circadian rhythm, lift my mood, and regulate energy for the rest of the day.

  Key takeaways from Alisa’s routine:

  • Family connection and gentle rehydration to start
  • Innovative use of technology (red light sauna) combined with traditional practices (journaling)
  • Contrast therapy (heat followed by cold) for physiological benefits
  • Strategic caffeine timing to work with natural hormone cycles
  • Grounding practices that connect with nature

  Paloma Chiara - Life Coach for High-Achievers

  As a life coach who has spent many years working with entrepreneurs across multiple time zones, Paloma Chiara has developed a routine that maximizes both physiological regulation and professional preparation. Her approach reflects the same principles she teaches her high-achieving clients: intentional breathing, gentle body preparation, and strategic energy management for demanding schedules.

  9:00 AM – I begin with a specialized breathing practice focused on progressively extending my inhale and exhale capacity—challenging myself to breathe slower each day. This isn’t just meditation; it’s training my nervous system to naturally operate at a more regulated baseline.

  9:15 AM – Still in bed, I do a series of TRE movements that help discharge tension and regulate my autonomic nervous system.

  9:30 AM – I enjoy matcha paired with overnight chia pudding and granola that I prepared the evening before.

  10:00 AM – I move through my complete self-care routine: washing my face, applying sunscreen, following my skincare regimen, styling my hair, and getting dressed.

  10:30 AM – I review my to-do list and begin taking calls from European clients. This strategic scheduling allows me to serve clients across continents, often working late into the evening to accommodate American clients.

  Key takeaways from her routine:

  • Advanced breathing techniques that build both personal regulation and client teaching tools
  • Gentle physical preparation that models sustainable self-care for busy professionals
  • Strategic nutrition timing that supports sustained mental performance
  • Professional presentation that reinforces credibility with high-achieving clients
  • Intentional scheduling that maximizes global client accessibility while maintaining personal wellness

  How to Adapt Expert Routines to Your Life

  While these expert routines provide excellent inspiration, the key to success is adapting their strategies to fit your unique circumstances. Here’s how to customize these approaches based on your specific situation:

  Adapting for Work Schedule Constraints

  If you have an early commute:

  • Prepare everything the night before (clothes, breakfast, gym bag)
  • Create a “portable” routine you can do in transit (gratitude practice, audiobook learning)
  • Focus on quick, high-impact activities (5-minute stretch, protein-rich breakfast)

  If you work shifts:

  • Adapt the routine timing to your schedule (the activities matter more than the clock time)
  • Create consistent “waking up” rituals regardless of when you start work
  • Use light therapy to help regulate your circadian rhythm

  If you work from home:

  • Maintain structure even without a commute
  • Change clothes to signal the transition from personal to work time
  • Create physical boundaries between your morning routine space and workspace

  Adapting for Family Responsibilities

  With young children:

  • Include family activities as part of your routine
  • Prepare for interruptions with flexible timing
  • Model healthy habits for your children by including them when appropriate
  • Wake up 15-30 minutes before children to have some personal time

  With teenagers:

  • Use morning time for family connection and communication
  • Prepare healthy breakfast options they can grab easily
  • Set boundaries around phone use during morning hours

  As a caregiver:

  • Integrate care responsibilities into your routine mindfully
  • Find moments for micro-practices (deep breathing while helping others)
  • Use travel time to care facilities for mindfulness or learning

  Adapting for Living Situation

  In a small space:

  • Use bodyweight exercises that don’t require equipment
  • Practice meditation in bed or in a bathroom if needed
  • Create “ritual” objects that signal routine time (special mug, journal, candle)

  With roommates or family:

  • Communicate your routine needs and timing
  • Use headphones for meditation apps or podcasts
  • Find spaces that offer privacy (bathroom, closet, car)

  While traveling:

  • Create a minimal routine that works anywhere (breathing exercises, gratitude practice)
  • Pack a travel kit with routine essentials
  • Research hotel amenities or nearby facilities in advance

  Adapting for Personal Health Needs

  With chronic illness or disabilities:

  • Focus on energy management rather than energy creation
  • Adapt physical activities to your current capacity
  • Prioritize sleep quality and stress management
  • Consult healthcare providers about timing medications with routine activities

  With mental health considerations:

  • Start with very small, achievable habits to build confidence
  • Include mental health practices like mindfulness or journaling
  • Be gentle with yourself on difficult days
  • Consider professional support to develop healthy routines

  During pregnancy or postpartum:

  • Modify physical activities as recommended by healthcare providers
  • Focus on nutrition and gentle movement
  • Include rest and self-care as productive activities
  • Adjust expectations and be flexible with timing

  Adapting for Seasonal Changes

  Winter months:

  • Use light therapy or bright indoor lighting to combat seasonal depression
  • Adjust wake times to align with natural light patterns
  • Include warming practices (hot tea, gentle stretching)
  • Focus on indoor activities when weather prevents outdoor movement

  Summer months:

  • Take advantage of early natural light
  • Adjust timing to avoid peak heat if exercising outdoors
  • Stay hydrated with increased temperature and activity
  • Use longer daylight hours for evening routine preparation

  During time changes:

  • Gradually adjust routine timing by 15-minute increments
  • Be patient with your body’s adaptation period
  • Maintain consistent sleep duration even if timing shifts
  • Use natural light exposure to help reset your internal clock

  Your future self will thank you for the investment you make in these precious morning hours. The day you’ve always wanted starts with the morning you create.

  Read blog

• What Is the Root of Procrastination?

  Procrastination isn’t just about being lazy or lacking discipline—it often runs deeper than that. Whether it’s fear of failure, perfectionism, or simply feeling overwhelmed, putting things off can become a habit that quietly chips away at your confidence and goals. In this guide, we’ll explore what procrastination really is, why it happens, and how to break the cycle with practical strategies that actually work. No judgment—just clarity, awareness, and tools to help you take action with more ease.

  Why Am I a Procrastinator?

  If you’ve been calling yourself lazy for procrastinating, it’s time to shift that mindset. Most procrastinators actually care deeply about their work—they just feel blocked by something beneath the surface. Procrastination isn’t a character flaw. It’s often a response to emotional discomfort or fear.

  Instead of forcing yourself to “just do it,” it helps to ask what you’re really avoiding.

  Emotional Roots of Procrastination

  Many of the reasons behind procrastination are emotional, not logical. You’re not avoiding the task itself, but the feelings it triggers.

  Common emotional blocks include:

  • Fear of failure: You might put things off because it feels safer than trying and not succeeding. This fear often leads to self-sabotage, where avoidance becomes a form of protection.
  • Perfectionism: Wanting everything to be perfect can leave you paralyzed. If you’re waiting for the ideal time, mindset, or environment, you may never feel ready enough to start.
  • Low self-worth: You may subconsciously believe you’re not capable of doing a good job, so you delay to avoid “proving” that belief true.

  Procrastination as Emotional Avoidance

  Your brain is wired to avoid pain—whether physical or emotional. If a task feels overwhelming, boring, or high-pressure, your brain seeks a quick escape. That might look like scrolling through your phone, suddenly cleaning your entire kitchen, or endlessly organizing your to-do list.

  In the short term, this gives you relief. But long term, it adds stress and guilt.

  Feeling Overwhelmed or Under-Resourced

  Sometimes, procrastination is simply a sign that you don’t have enough clarity or capacity.

  • You may not know where to start.
  • You might be juggling too many tasks at once.
  • Your physical or mental energy could be low, but you’re pushing through anyway.

  In these cases, procrastination is your body’s way of asking for rest, direction, or help.

  Habits and Environment Matter Too

  Even if your reasons are emotional, your environment can reinforce your habits.

  • A cluttered workspace makes it harder to focus.
  • Notifications, open tabs, or even background noise can make small tasks feel harder than they are.
  • Without a planning system that fits your lifestyle, your intentions stay in your head instead of becoming action.

  This is why using a mobile-friendly planner with built-in spaces for goals, reflection, and daily tracking can help reduce resistance. The more aligned your tools are with your life, the easier it is to follow through.

  Your Brain Is Trying to Protect You

  It might sound strange, but procrastination is a form of self-protection. Your brain wants to shield you from discomfort, rejection, or burnout—even if the method is flawed. Instead of punishing yourself, practice self-compassion. Guilt adds weight to your tasks, while kindness lightens the load.

  Remember:

  • You’re not broken.
  • You’re responding to something real.
  • You can change the cycle—one small action at a time.

  Self-Improvement for High Achievers Group on Telegram

  Get daily insights, support, and discussions to improve your leadership skills, mindset, work/life balance, time and energy management, as well as overcoming perfectionism, self-doubt, limiting beliefs, and more...

  Join group

  How Does Procrastination Work?

  At its core, procrastination is not a time management issue—it’s an emotional regulation issue. When a task brings up uncomfortable feelings—like fear of failure, overwhelm, boredom, or confusion—your brain looks for a quick way to avoid that discomfort.

  Instead of facing the task, you might:

  • Open social media.
  • Clean something that isn’t urgent.
  • Start a different task that feels easier.
  • Tell yourself you’ll do it “later”—and feel guilty afterward.

  These are avoidance behaviors, and they give you temporary relief—but the stress of the original task doesn’t go away.

  Your Brain Chooses Immediate Reward

  Procrastination is often driven by the brain’s preference for short-term rewards over long-term goals. This is known as time inconsistency.

  Here’s what happens:

  • The logical part of your brain (prefrontal cortex) knows you want to finish that important project.
  • But the emotional part (limbic system) wants to avoid discomfort and feel good now.
  • The limbic system wins, unless you create systems or strategies to interrupt the cycle.

  This is why you might genuinely want to finish something, but still scroll or delay. It’s not a lack of desire—it’s biology.

  The Task Feels Bigger Than It Is

  When you imagine the task, your brain may exaggerate its difficulty or pain. This leads to:

  • Feeling stuck before even starting.
  • Assuming it will take longer than it will.
  • Thinking you need the perfect conditions to begin.

  This mental distortion makes the task feel heavier than it is, which fuels more avoidance.

  

  Avoidance Reinforces The Habit

  Every time you avoid a task and feel temporary relief, your brain takes note: Avoiding helps me feel better. This strengthens the procrastination loop.

  Over time, this becomes a habit:

  • Discomfort → Avoid → Relief → Repeat
  • The more often this happens, the harder it feels to break the cycle.

  But just as the brain can form a procrastination habit, it can also learn new ones with repetition and awareness.

  The Stress Builds In The Background

  Even while avoiding the task, your brain doesn’t forget about it. It lingers in your mental space, causing:

  • Guilt
  • Anxiety
  • Shame
  • Sleep problems

  This background stress drains your energy and focus—even if you’re not consciously thinking about the task. It’s a hidden cost that makes procrastination even more exhausting.

  You Can Rewire The Cycle

  The good news is that procrastination is learned—and it can be unlearned. Understanding how it works is already a powerful first step.

  With the right tools, like the Mobile-Friendly Planner Spreadsheet, you can:

  • Break tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks.
  • Keep your long-term goals visible alongside weekly tasks.
  • Easily move postponed tasks forward instead of forgetting them.
  • Track habits and spot where avoidance tends to show up.

  By using planning tools that align with how your brain works, and practicing compassion instead of guilt, you can slowly shift the pattern.

  

  Check out the Mobile-Friendly Planner Spreadsheet Template for only 4$

  More info

  How Do I Stop Procrastinating?

  Before you jump into action, pause and reflect: What exactly am I avoiding right now? Is it fear of judgment? Confusion about where to begin? A task that feels too boring or too big?

  Understanding the emotional reason behind your delay is the first step to shifting it.

  • Ask yourself: What part of this task feels uncomfortable?
  • Write it down to bring clarity.
  • Sometimes, naming the feeling (like fear, boredom, or insecurity) takes away its power.

  Break The Task Into Tiny Steps

  Overwhelm is one of the biggest causes of procrastination. When something feels too big, your brain tells you to run away from it.

  Instead of setting the goal as “Finish the report,” try:

  • “Write the report title.”
  • “Open a blank document.”
  • “List 3 points I want to cover.”

  These micro-tasks feel doable and create momentum. Starting is often the hardest part—after that, it gets easier.

  Use Visual Tools To Stay Focused

  Having a planner that works with your brain (not against it) can reduce mental friction. A digital planner like the Mobile-Friendly Planner Spreadsheet helps you:

  • Set monthly goals that stay visible on your weekly view.
  • Track habits and tasks without flipping between tabs or notebooks.
  • Easily move postponed tasks to the next week so you don’t lose track.

  Seeing everything laid out clearly lowers decision fatigue and keeps your intentions in sight.

  Reduce Distractions Intentionally

  If you’re surrounded by distractions, your willpower is already in a losing battle.

  • Turn off notifications or use “Do Not Disturb” mode.
  • Put your phone in another room if possible.
  • Clear your desk of items you don’t need for the current task.

  You don’t need a perfect environment—just a little less noise.

  Try The “Just 5 Minutes” Rule

  This technique works wonders if you’re stuck in a loop of overthinking. Tell yourself you only have to do the task for 5 minutes. Most of the time, once you begin, you’ll keep going.

  This bypasses the mental resistance and shifts you into motion with minimal pressure.

  Celebrate Progress, Not Just Completion

  Your brain needs rewards. Don’t wait until the whole project is done—celebrate each step forward.

  • Place a check to mark off what you’ve finished.
  • Pause for a moment and say, “That was a win.”
  • Treat yourself to a small break or comfort after each milestone.

  This builds positive reinforcement and makes future tasks feel less dreadful.

  Be Compassionate With Yourself

  You won’t stop procrastinating overnight. But every time you act with awareness and kindness, you make it easier to try again next time.

  • You’re not lazy—you’re human.
  • Change happens through patience and repetition, not pressure.
  • Give yourself credit for every moment of progress.

  The goal isn’t to be perfectly productive—it’s to build trust with yourself that you can follow through, even when it’s hard.

  Quiz: What Is Blocking Your Success?

  This quick quiz will help you figure out which mental or behavioral pattern might be holding you back from achieving your full potential. Identifying your specific success blocker is the first step toward breaking through to new levels of achievement and fulfillment.

  Read each question and choose the answer that feels most true to your situation.

  No email or payment is required to complete the quiz and receive your personalized insights.

  Paloma Chiara

  Once you have your primary success blocker, you have clarity about what’s been holding you back. This awareness is powerful—many people spend years struggling without understanding the specific pattern that’s limiting their progress.

  Remember, these patterns aren’t permanent character traits but rather habitual ways of thinking and behaving that can be changed with the right guidance and practice.

  If you’re ready to break through your specific blocker and achieve the success you know you’re capable of, send me an email to try out a coaching session. Your breakthrough awaits!

  Read blog